Jul 08
May 07
Americans don’t need a reason to get scared. Being paranoid is one of the qualities that Americans are proud of and they would go to any lengths to ensure that every generation inherits this “feature”.
The Swine Flu is yet another invention of the americans to ensure that the average joe is aware that americans are supposed to wake up every morning fearing that the world would collapse around them and that they have to take extreme steps to prevent that from happening.
So, what can happen because of this swine flu scare?
- There will be a movie released this winter named “Aporkalypse now” where the main scene would be hundreds of pigs escaping from a sty and running into New York.
- Americans would start shooting pigs instead of brown bears.
- Piggy banks would be replaced by Chicky banks with the tagline “Flu-free”. But, next year, after the onset of bird flu, these would be recalled by the manufacturers.
- America would launch a military campaign against Iran on the grounds that muslims don’t eat pork and this has led to the explosion of the pig population in the gulf which poses a “direct” threat to the spread of swine flu in USA.
- The porn industry would make use of this opportunity and would release a movie named “Piggy Piggy bang bang”
Nov 25
It is a known fact that Americans like it big, so big that visitors from outside the US start to feel a sense of “small”ness. I came back from Seattle last weekend (my third trip to the US) and looking back at my experiences there, my world is tiny compared to theirs.
- I am used to buying tshirts of size L or XL. But, it was a surprise to me that i had to choose medium or even small in some shops when i was in the US. I was flattered. I remember, back in school, that friends used to joke that one doesn’t need to wear underwear if you were wearing a over sized tshirt, as the bottom of the tshirt fell way below your waistline. if a normal person were to try on the XL sizes available in the US, you don’t even near to wear socks/shoes!
- i have seen the size XL and rarely XXL, but only in the US have i seen the size XXXL. There are also separate sections called “Big and Tall” which ironically have a small size too. Of course, the small in these sections can easily fit in my entire family!
- Small in the US is not small for the rest of the world. When we were at a movie, i ordered a small coke. The “small” coke arrived in a cup almost as long as my … fore-arm!
- In one of the cafes in Chicago airport, i saw a mom (super-sized one) feeding her small baby (a small one not capable of talking yet, sitting inside a stroller) french fries. No wonder, the average american turns out to be a super-sized adult.
- Everyone knows COSTCO, the wholesaler where everything is cheap compared to other stores. But, there is a catch. You can only buy huge american-sized stuff. That would mean you have buy at least 5 kgs of potato chips or few kilos of chocolates.
God help america!
No wonder stores like COSTCO are so popular, where the smallest chips packet would be the 1 kg one.
Nov 10
Pickup from the Hilton las vegas in a stretch limo and then a helicopter flight to the bottom of the grand canyon – Cool ! Look out for more photos and updates on my seattle trip blog.
