Well, all this was until the recent world cup. Amdocs decided to show the matches on big screen. No, this was not what attracted me to watch the matches. All the matches were preceded by quiz and bingo events with good prizes. It is a different fact that i didn’t win any. But, i ended up watching the matches though.
Then, I started comparing football with my passion, cricket. I began to realise how inferior cricket was, in comparison to this great game. If there were to be a definition of cricket, it would be something like this…
“You have two sides, one out on the field and one in . Each man that’s in the side that’s in, goes out and when he’s out, he comes in and the next man goes in until he’s out. When they are all out, the side that’s out comes in and the side that’s been in goes out and tries to get those coming in out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out. When both sides have been in and out including the not outs, that’s the end of the game!”
George Bernard Shaw once said,
“Cricket is a game played by 22 fools and watched by 22,000 fools”
For once, i totally agree with him. Cricket is a game which is totally against the concept of sport. Sport should above all, give exercise to the players. How does cricket justify this in terms of the time spent? Cricket is a game in which only two players out of eleven play, while the others can choose to play cards or even sleep, and two players of the other team (the bowler and the wicket-keeper) sweat it out while the others keep trying their luck in the field. How are we to account for this colossal waste of time, not to mention the huge sums of money spent on it, in the name of playing a game?
Talking abt skill levels, imagine the wonderful game of baseball , where so much skill is required to hit the ball within a particular sector, whereas in cricket , u can hit it anywhere in the 360 degree radius, C’mon u don’t need skill to hit it anywhere u want.
The even stranger thing about this game is the longer version, test cricket. I am sure that Test cricket must have been invented by a man, whose wife would have commented , “The longer the better” and he immediately created test cricket. But , the poor man , in his hurry , forgot to listen completely to his wife who had said ” The longer the better and of course with a proper climax” imagine watching a long and boring test match and at the end of 5 days , the two captains shake hands and walk off! No victor, no loser, C’mon where is the thrill, ecstasy?Nothing ! Test cricket is the perfect example describing the word anti-climax !
Cricket is definitely not a brave mans game. You have a thigh guard, an arm guard and so many other guards, virtually to cover every inch of your body, whereas in baseball, when batting, they have to stand on a home plate, without the luxury of a facemask, pads on their ribs, padded gloves, or pads on their legs, all protections available to a cricketer. Now that is a mans game, definitely not cricket.
Do you know why Adolf Hitler banned cricket in Germany?. Once He was watching a match that went on and on. He kept asking when it would be over, and someone told him it would continue the next day for the entire day and well into the evening. He said, ‘By the time this stupid game is over, I could have conquered three countries.’ “
In the so-called gentleman’s game of cricket, the players throw the ball in the air after a catch, shout and scream after a run out or for an lbw decision, and deliberately intimidate and sledge the opposition players. This is definitely not the characteristics of a gentleman’s game. Nowadays cricket is more a war of words rather than skill. Even players from countries who cannot speak few sentences in English, are perfect in pronouncing all the 4 letter words in English. Look at what the English have taught the world !
cricketers are stupid people This quote by india’s former captain Saurav Ganguly would show that
“Nobody is a born captain. Most of the time I have gone on instinct”.
So, dear ladies and gentleman, never ever try to follow this game. Stay away from it, make good use of your time rather than wasting your time following or playing cricket. I wonder why I wasted so much time writing about this stupid game. I could have rather spent time swatting flies instead.
The views expressed above are from the thoughts of a ghost which took over my body while i was engrossed in refreshing the scores of a closely fought division 4 match happening in England.
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December 5th, 2006 at 1:54 pm
Hi Rajaram,
Is there any idea that you are going into politics..
To start with Anti publicity.. and taking the place of Shard Pawar
December 25th, 2006 at 9:29 am
iam with u rajaram….cricket is a boring game,and a waste of time……
January 5th, 2007 at 10:25 am
grow up and get a life kid.
January 5th, 2007 at 12:21 pm
thank you papa!
Sorry, I can’t write more, have to watch the highlights of today’s match!
February 1st, 2007 at 4:54 am
you sir have spoken the truth and have raised your voice on behalf of al those
who have been silenced by these cricket fanatics.I applaud your courage for saying
what you have, especially considering you are an INDIAN.
March 30th, 2007 at 7:47 am
Rajaram,
after early world cup exit every word you said looks true. But cricket is like a game of card, along with a good set you need luck and a mind that plays the right card at right time!! Its the only game that can make your heart flip 300 time (or 2700 if its a test match)
April 30th, 2007 at 5:49 pm
dude,c’mon,if u have nuthing good to say about cricket then keep ur damn mouth shut,this isn’t humorous,if anyone is a fool it’s u,dumbass.
May 1st, 2007 at 11:26 am
I saw his article posted on http://www.bestofindya.com.
Guys take it easy. It’s his opinion. You have to give him for gathering information and putting his thoughts out.
May 1st, 2007 at 10:44 pm
i guess ppl aren’t reading this completely! The last line says “The views expressed above are from the thoughts of a ghost which took over my body while i was engrossed in refreshing the scores of a closely fought division 4 match happening in England”
I am a big fan of the game whether or not India or any other team performs or not.
The above is from the content i used to speak in a debate where i had to speak for the topic “Cricket is a waste of time”, just because there were many others who wanted to speak against
August 9th, 2007 at 7:26 am
yes DUDE YOU R ABSOLUTELY CORRECT CRICKET IS THE MOST IDIOTIC GAME I HAVE EVER SEEN TOO BAD INDIANS ARE SO CRAZY ABOUT THIS STUPID GAME. HOW ABOUT FOOTBALL?
September 5th, 2007 at 10:49 am
Cricket it lazy man’s paradise. It is devils invention to make human race less productive. All who watch, play and follow cricket are idiots and with low IQ. I agree 100% with you Rajaram. Keep up the good work.
Vijay
September 5th, 2007 at 10:50 am
lazy lethargic sluggards play and make millions of others lazies.
Go to hell Cricket.
September 5th, 2007 at 11:23 am
there are so many important things in the world to worry about. i wonder why these cricket playing animals were even born into this world.
cricket increases blood pressure and anxiety.
September 10th, 2007 at 9:16 am
The funny thing to me is that the supporters of this horrible game would attack you for writing an article like this. If you wrote it about any other sport, the followers of that sport, who are confident in its validity (entertainment) would not attack you…
Anyway, good job with the blog and i may contact you when i visit Cyprus. I am a Cypriot living in California now and found you after the IKEA posting. You may be the first person who has been to the San Jose IKEA and the Cyprus one and i may be the 2nd when i come…:)
George
September 26th, 2007 at 4:02 am
Not the cricket is stupid but the indian cricketers are stupid.
November 7th, 2007 at 4:54 pm
I agree with your ghost, hehe.
November 13th, 2007 at 5:17 am
The game is definitely not stupid, and even those who disagree could put across their views in a dignified fashion as the author has done. Comments such as these “i wonder why these cricket playing animals were even born into this world.”, reflect mental immaturity. One really wonders how such people can ponder about “important things in the world”.
People who comment must understand that it does not suffice if they issue bold statements, there must be sound logic behind them. A Mr.Vijay says “All who watch, play and follow cricket are idiots and with low IQ.” This is as absurd as absurd can be. And if anyone’s IQ is to be questioned it must be that of the one who has commented.
January 4th, 2008 at 8:39 am
Cricket is a stupid game. Thats rich coming from a football fan. Running around a football pitch for 90 minutes or so, chasing a piece of pigskin as though it was a roasted hog. How primative is that. Looking at your photo you look like a primative stupid Indian geek.
January 27th, 2008 at 7:58 pm
Exactly Rajaram…. this is what I was thinking about in the morning today…specially the “no exercise for players” part neither in the physical nor at the intellectual level … its only at the commercial level
. Good for only BCCI or the IPL teams sponsoring corporates
Actually I’m dyslexic to cricket…. so to say.( Again actually, anyone in our country is considered a retard if not following a ball-to-ball account of the day’s match )
First He created humans & the world was populated, then He said let there be light – the world was lit up. Then He said let there be cricket & the world became stupid ! ( I can’t help rolling in laughter )
And come to think of it, we are the reigning champions of the dunce cap of cricket since we are nation obsessed with it.
We will remember, for many decades to come, Yuvi’s six sixes in an over against England in the semi-finals of the Twenty20 World Cup but we would have long back forgotten that some villagers in Orissa ate mango kernels to survive the famine a few years back.
February 22nd, 2008 at 12:55 pm
Rajaram,
Although I have no qualms about you expressing your opinion, I have to admit, your logic is appalling..!
April 20th, 2008 at 11:17 pm
Cricket is stupid, the rules are confusing and the game is too long. Baseball is bad but this is worse.
May 2nd, 2008 at 12:53 am
iam with you dear friend cricket is a stupid game which is ruining all other sports in india i hate it very much now they are making it like brazelian carnival with cheer leaders also. other sports in india will improve only if this stupid game is banned ,it is also making many indians lazy .all what you have written about cricket is correct i apperciate you and keep it up
May 5th, 2008 at 4:30 am
Hi Rajaram,
Very good article. I enjoyed the humor. I knew from the title it self that you are big cricket fan and writing this sarcastically. Kudos man!
September 7th, 2008 at 9:57 am
Raghupati Raghava,
It seems so to the onlooker and especially so when the Indian team is involved where lethargy qualifies for immediate entry. However it is not meant to be so. Just observe the difference between Australian and the India Pak fielders at field changes following an over. The Aussies are professional and business like hustling and charging. Even the Sri lankans are better than us. The common prception in categorizing players as batsmen and bowlers results in the players we see now. A true player is one who can do anything anytime anyplace, in other words a true athlete. They will make their presence felt everywhere just like a good soccer player (even in soccer only 2 or 3 really qualify – the rest are there to pass the ball to those 3). Playing and watching cricket are two different things. I played a whole lot but never ever sat down to watch since I am restless (?). A good cricketer can with an hours practice play hard ball (baseball) while the reverse is to watch agony.
September 7th, 2008 at 9:58 am
P.S. I was just playing with your name. Please dont take offense. Nice blog and Congratulations on the birth of your daughter.
February 13th, 2009 at 8:50 am
Rajaram,
Reading some of the comments to your humor post, I felt if more blonds read your blog than men.
R Sathyamurthy
April 18th, 2009 at 6:42 pm
yeah. worse game on the planet. banned it. only indians are running after it now.
May 9th, 2009 at 3:33 am
I totally agree with you!
May 30th, 2009 at 4:50 am
Must be a Modi bootlicker
July 4th, 2009 at 7:15 pm
jealous!? cricket rocks. infact cricket is far superior game.
who won the T20 Worldcup though?.. lolz
August 4th, 2009 at 11:00 am
very good comment about cricket. i totally agree with your comment
August 24th, 2009 at 8:35 am
Cricket is one hyped up game.Cricket when seen as a sport of atheletic ability,team work,grace it falls flat on its face.Its a game for unhealthy lazy lards who become arm chair experts when off the field.Its unhealthy focus is killing the lazy Indian and rest of the games.Only 10 nations or so play it hardly international .Only we take it very seriously.It doesnt command such attention money or media hype in any country other than the Subcontinent.Wake up..ooohhh I forgot we like to be arm chair experts like me here….
August 24th, 2009 at 3:10 pm
Rajaram…
You are a complete genius and should be running the country. If everyone could see this through your vision… the world would be more productive and less time will be wasted.
Rock on dude.
September 4th, 2009 at 1:18 am
cricket is so so so stupid it should not even be a sport
September 6th, 2009 at 8:50 pm
Since your weak of mind and cannot keep track with cricket just watch football
December 6th, 2009 at 6:40 am
i would like to say something to those who think cricket is idiot.That have you ever tried to play cricket actually.if you pay once with a real cricket ball and good bowling attack you will find out how hard is it to paly.you fools think that it is just the matter of bowling and hitting.To pay criket you musta have confidence,skills,patience.what do you need to play football,run around the park like a horse and kick the ball as hard as you can when it comes to you.Thats all is needed.ha isnt it true.well i woud like to challenge all those who think cricket is an idiots game.first ball a one over without balling a wide from 22 yards away at a reasoanbale pace.and next thing score anout thirty runs facing against a really fast bowler .can you do that i bet you acnt do that.you guys have no idea how much concentration it is reaquired to play cricket.
well some say watching cricket is boring .its only boring when you dont understand it.you guys donot have the mind to understand the rules of cricket.
well i would like to say how hard it is to paly cricket.while batting you have to wathc the ball all over until it hits your bat.and that i not the only thing .you need to be perfectly balanced and you need to hit the ball at the right time in the right place with a right thinking . can you do that. i you can do that then only i will agree with your words .
what ever you have to say send it on my mail.
football geeks and baseball mads
December 20th, 2009 at 9:17 pm
Damn, whoever says cricket is boring really doesn’t know what he’s talking about. It’s more skilfull than football, where 20 players run around after a ball and knock each other over while the other 2 just stand stranded at each pole.
Cricket requires skill, thought and intelligence. It’s not just a bat and ball game, moreover it’s a mindgame that can be very interesting to watch once understood.
Anyway, won’t waste my time to educate fools. Once a fool, always a fool. Go play rugby, and destroy your head, and make yourself even more dumb and foolish.
January 6th, 2010 at 10:39 pm
Cricket is obviously too complex a sport for your tiny little head to cope with :/ And that’s no ones fault, is it now.
March 7th, 2010 at 8:26 pm
if you talk about skills cricket requires far more skills than any other game. Its combination of art and science. For example, Beckham bend very big ball using long distance whereas wasim akram swings small heavy ball only on 22 yards and bend is remarkable. Ordinary person can’t even understand science behind this technique. Only artists can play cricket thats why lots of people in this world never try to play this game because it needs intelligence which majority lacks.
April 24th, 2010 at 2:05 am
What are the three IPLs?
Too much cricket took away the interest to watch cricket that too being a parent. Now IPL and in April it is world cup.
According to me there are 3 IPLs. Of course, the well-known expansion is Indian Premier League. However, this IPL makes the students run out by another IPL known as Interrupt Priority Level. Here, watching Cricket in the exam month of March, interrupting their exam priorities, will surely force them bowled out by scoring less marks. While being bowled out, these poor chaps are forced to witness organizers and IPL players scoring or not scoring runs, but surely making money to remain secure forever in future. Whereas our poor students will have no other option, but to remain in their third IPL Zone, known as, Idiotic Personality Level.
June 9th, 2010 at 7:37 am
10 minutes of my life down the drain…
June 13th, 2010 at 6:52 am
Rich or poor everyone can play football. Football transcends language barriers, creed, colour or race. It is universal and simple. That’s why it is the beautiful game.
July 14th, 2010 at 4:39 pm
come on dude…its completely acceptable when the people in the world thinks in your vision….
December 20th, 2010 at 8:57 am
Sachin Tendulkar. What does honorary Group Captain rank mean? (Humor, a longer version and a bit more)
In memory of Flying Officer Nirmaljit Singh Sekhon, PVC, posthumously, IAF and J R D Tata, Father of Aviation, honorary Air Vice Marshal, IAF.
Tendulkar as an honorary Group Captain rank is not part of the BCCI selectors’ chain of command but can issue orders which fielder can be placed at silly point. Mutiny of troops, especially Dhoni and Yuvraj, can be tried under summary court martial.
His first order is that Harsha Bhogle be tried of war crimes by talking crap ( radars found Bhogle’s gibberish at 2.3 Mach speed) as a commentator. Cricket historian, Boria Mazumdar, will be summarily executed for the war crime of putting TV cricket viewers to asleep. Tendulkar also has the right that Hitler’s mustache can be twirled.
Tendulkar as an honorary Group Captain can command paper planes ( Squadron 10. Nickname: Aai La. Motto: My Bat Will Do The Talking) into war against schoolboys. Since he is outside BCCI’s chain of command, he has a right not to salute Sharad Pawar.
His first duty is to defend against Lalit Modi for breaking wind in T20’s hospitality boxes. If he helps win India winning World Cup in 2011, Sharad Pawar will give a speech to ICC, “If the BCCI Empire and its cricket wealth lasts for a thousand years, cricket maniacs will still say, ‘This was Tendulkar’s finest hour.”
After Tendlya’s first sortie, he has debriefed BCCI selectors and has said that Australia is a clear and present danger to India winning 2011 World Cup. His strategy is to carpet bomb Australians as ‘racists” before a match.
It is unbecoming of an officer and gentleman to tease Sharad Pawar by saying, “ Pawarsaheb, you look just like Luftwaffe’s Reichsmarschall Hermann Goering. Obese, rotund and plumpish. Right down to white tunic. Exercise, saheb.”
Jokes about honorary Group Captain Sachin Tendulkar’s high-pitched voice is an act of high treason. Not forwarding emails that Tendlya make you feel proud to be Indian is sedition.
Since he outranks Sanjay Manjrekar, he has the right to command his Aide-de- Camp, Ravi Shastri, and summarily throw Sanjay Manjrekar out of the commentators’ box. for any criticism against honorary Group Captain Sachin Tendulkar.
It is incumbent on ever Indian watching a match in a stadium should cheer honorary Group Captain Sachin Tendulkar by saying, “Saachinn, Saaachin, Saachinn” in his nervous nineties. Following Tendulkar’s century, there will be a bugle call, firecrackers will go off, all will kiss their lockets and look up to God in gratitude .
Babus have also come up with a proposal that God in the heaven should look to brave solider, Tendlya, on earth in gratitude. God is studying the proposal but He is confused thanks to triplicate of all proposals.
One of Tendlya’s benefits as an honorary Group Captain is to import Ferrari or any other foreign car and get exempted for paying custom duty.
In any injury, in any dogfight, against any ICC Test playing nation, it is the duty of Indians to pray that Tendlya’s recover from injury and get back into dogfight.
His sublime heroism, supreme gallantry and determination, above and beyond the call of duty of shifting his jockstrap box guard ever other over and tapping the pitch wirh his bat, honorary Group Captain Tendulkar is awarded the PCE (Param Celebrity Endorser), India’s highest money-making machine.
The two others who have won the PCE (Param Celebrity Endorser), India’s highest money-making machine, are Amitabh Bachchan and Shah Rukh Khan.
———————————————————————————————————-
Jokes aside, Tendulkar should not wear the IAF uniform which the babus are cricket maniacs who “suggested ” this honorary rank. I ask Tendlya: Have you read IAF history before you don that uniform? Even ceremonial. Do you know who Flying Officer Nirmaljit Singh Sekhon is? He is the only member of the Indian Air Force to be honored with PVC, posthumously. You are not in the tradition of Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj, Baji Prabhu Deshpande, Tanaji Malusare and so many. You deserve every cricket honor but not the honor to defense of our nation. Tendlya, have you have done anything for our IAF? Nothing.
India’s World Cup winning captain Kapil Dev had received the honorary rank of Lieutenant Colonel of the Territorial Army. It is Territorial Army, not Indian Army. JRD Tata, the Father of Indian Aviation, was made an honorary Air Vice Marshal in 1974. Would JRD accept Arjuna Award? Certainly not.
In 1930, the Aga Khan Trophy was offered for the first Indian to fly solo from India to England or vice versa. J.R.D. competed, taking off from Karachi to London. When he landed at Aboukir Bay in Egypt, he found that Aspy Engineer, the other contender, flying from London to Karachi, was stranded in the desert airfield for want of a spark plug!
J.R.D. sportingly parted with his spare one and they continued their journey in opposite directions. Aspy beat him by a couple of hours. ‘I am glad he won,’ said J.R.D., ‘because it helped him get into the Royal Indian Air Force.’ Later Aspy was to be the second Indian to be the chief of the Indian Air Force.
~ a cricket lover ( Shivaji Park boy. Alumni of Ruia & Poddar College , Matunga, Mumbai maximum Test and first class cricket players for India though in decline) but loves IAF way, way more.
December 24th, 2010 at 4:48 pm
This webpage is just a waste and full of unwanted things … all the things in this page about cricket is truly false …
December 30th, 2010 at 7:21 pm
Guys cricket is a stupid game.Its here only because its the ONLY game that has so many pauses in between(just think from rubbing the ball to walking to the run up point) so that the TV channels which can run half the time in advertisement.Its a decade old conspiracy by the media and the cricket honchos( BCCI )to earn money and make passionate stupids of the rest.For those of you who want to exercise their intellectual muscle(mind game?) please try chess.For those of you who like to play random with a toss of a coin try horse racing or cards.Please understand that cricket is not considered a national game especially in UK football is.English made this game so that they can have a nice sun bath in a country that has 2 months of sunny climate.We need 45 minutes of workout and be back to work.Not waiting for my turn to bat for 45 minutes. Plus I quote Prion(myself) in this blog “Cricket is one hyped up game.Cricket when seen as a sport of athletic ability,team work,grace it falls flat on its face.Its a game for unhealthy lazy lards who become arm chair experts when off the field.Its unhealthy focus is killing the lazy Indian and rest of the games.Only 10 nations or so play it hardly international .Only we take it very seriously.It doesn’t command such attention money or media hype in any country other than the Subcontinent.Wake up..oohs I forgot we like to be arm chair experts like me here….” So apt about teamwork when 3/4 of the game 3/4 of the people are standing still.
February 12th, 2011 at 5:29 pm
I think he is a fool but he tells to others that 22,000 peoples are fool inside his brain only the clay is there.He is the no.1 fool in the world thanks for my comment
April 3rd, 2011 at 8:06 pm
@ Bullet:
If you think G.B.Shaw is a fool, you will definitely tell people like Einstein, Edison, Shakespeare, Marlow, Stephen Hawking are also fools…!!!
Cricket is a total waste of time and money. People will never go to work, students will never go to school, colleges. All will sit infront of TV. Once while I went to a Hospital with my cousins accident case, the Doctor was infront of TV and reluctant to come to attend the bleeding patients. Unfortunately, we lost 5 young lives on that day. If that Doctor was ready to attend them on time, few of them might have been alive now.
April 5th, 2011 at 10:51 pm
Oh Anti-Cricket blog hahaha ;P alright here we go. few of you must be left out by your friends because all they wanted to is watch cricket. other few this one is a good one…especially in india there are football fans who feel their sports is completely neglected because everybody loves cricket. most of you have little brains to understand the game so you come up here and express all you silly views…bunch of idiots lol…the recent cricket world cup was a great success….FUCK YOU football fans who are anti cricket…and as far as the writer is concern if i meet u someday i will bash ur head with the stumps and show it to all of the anti cricket idiots over here.
PS: I love all sports but i hate idiots like you. no offence to any football fans who does not hate cricket……its a beautiful game.
April 6th, 2011 at 11:56 am
Saif, was fun to read your comment. It is pretty obvious that you didnt get the pun
April 28th, 2011 at 12:36 pm
cricket is religion passion and life fotball sucks and cricket rules
June 21st, 2011 at 12:03 am
some guys are so dumb, they dont get wat mr rajaram was tryin to say, he was kiddin the whole tym, get lives -.-
July 4th, 2011 at 8:58 am
Haha you guys think cricket is fun and hard. Give me a break. Bty, some idiot said that football is easy game and all you do is kick the ball; YEAH MY ASS! Every time you hit the ball, you need to rotate your feet and body angle the right position to make even a simple pass. You need endurance, strength, great deal of eye – feet coordination, fast reflexes, speed, etc. Also there are sooo many moves that are aesthetically pleasing and cricket has absolutely nothing aesthetically pleasing to watch. To that idiot: you are not plain running with your self moron; you are running with a ball and trying to pass people while running with the ball! Yeah I would like to see you do that! Plus, It is a game the whole world loves and cricket can never ever come close. In Cricket, all you see is someone throwing the ball (I don’t care how much spin he puts on it, same shit you see every time!) I’ve seeing Indians trying to play other sports before and they suck at almost all; Basketball, football, tennis, you name it. You have over 1 billion people and yet have nothing worthy in Olympics! Only shit you can play is cricket since it doesn’t require any athleticism. After all I said, you guys probably think I am a hater but love the Indians and their food/culture but sorry bros you guys suck at sports and cricket is really boring, PERIOD! I don’t see what is so entertaining about it. Baseball is in the same bty! Side note: playing cricket with friends might be fun but watching it (except Indians and Pakistanis) is absolutely boring…
July 29th, 2011 at 12:54 pm
Finally! I’ve found a place where I can air my views on this RIDICULOUS ‘Sport’ (used most loosely.)
Having skimmed through the comments above a little, I’m in agreement with the rants that have been published completely. This isn’t a sport – it’s barely a past-time. How the hell can you have a ‘game’ (again loose term) that lasts for 5 days? Why? If you can’t get it over with in less than a few hours, it’s time you’ll never get back to do something more interesting….like sleep. Most of the people attending the ridiculous events spend half of their time asleep anyway, as the game is so tedious.
Many years ago, I found the source of the immense frustration I have with this game – English Cricketer Bob Willis and Commentator Richie Benaud. Bob, I’m sure, was a fantastic bloke and good at his ‘sport’, but why, even as a ‘fast bowler’ did he require an 18mile run-up? Walking back to his starting point took a good 2-3minutes of time. Then, he ran at a pelt (for the first 20 yards) before getting out of breath and taking another 2-3 minutes (well, it seemed like it!) to get to the crease where he would hurl the ball down with all his might. Then what happened was that the twit standing in the protective gear the other end patted the ball into the ground to the sounds of Richie Benaud stating ‘what a marvellous delivery that was….’. Why was it? Why didn’t the twit hit the darned thing? Why didn’t it hit the wicket? To cap all this, Bob now has to go and throw the damned ball another 5 times before giving it to some other idiot to have a go. Well, that is unless Bob’s made a misjudgement and now it’s a no-ball so he’s got to do it 6 more times.
What’s with the patting of the ground in front of the batsman with his bat? You don’t see the bowler doing this to ensure a smooth passage for his ball, do you? It’s simply there to make this tedious game last even longer.
To cap it all, I always thought sport was about winners and losers – a defined line between the two. In football, one side scores more than the other and someone wins. Unless they both score the same, then it’s a draw. Simple. Tennis – one bloke/woman gets more games than the other to win a set and more sets than the other to win the match. Simple stuff really. But with cricket, no, not that simple, is it? Of course not. Scoring more runs than the other team doesn’t mean winning by 2 runs, oh no, it means winning by 5 wickets. So how does that work again? To cap it all, one side can score 350 runs, the other 296 and yet it’s declared a draw because of the amount of wickets…per-lease. Now we have another incredible ‘rule’. It’s possible to win a game by a ‘method’ rather than scoring more than the other team (for the uninitiated, the ‘Duckworth Lewis method). This is a scientific calculation apparently. How can you win a game based on this type of scoring? If one side scores 150 and the other 75, then it chucks it down with rain, it’s match abandoned, simple yes?
How can a game stop for lunch and tea? Sure, stop halfway through to give the players a break, but not for an hour’s lunch and a 30minute tea break in the afternoon, that’s just plain daft.
Then there’s the weather. Footballers, rugby players, US Football, Aussie Rules etc all go out when it’s as muddy as can be and still manage to play their sport. Rain, hail and lightning don’t necessarily stop them. Tennis is a different proposition – playing on a wet court on grass can be dangerous, so they stop until it stops, fair enough. With cricket though, it’s the extreme again – one spot of rain and it’s covers on the wicket and everyone in for a warm by the fire, a cuppa and a cucumber sarnie. They even do this, if it LOOKS like it will rain, claiming ‘bad light’. Rubbish – bad light my foot. Do yourselves a favour, change the ball to a yellow one and carry on.
Ah yes, and the ‘complaints’ about the ‘different wicket’. Don’t know if they’d ever noticed (as they spend half their time at lunch or tea), but cricket is played in grass. The wicket they’re playing on, gets used for the ball to bounce ONCE and is cut, seemingly, with some form of hair clipper device to get rid of the grass and leave a thin layer on top of the mud. HOW MUCH DIFFERENCE CAN THERE BE??? Old Trafford, Headiingly and Lords are all cricket grounds with grass on them, so surely they must be the same??? Or am I simplifying this too much for their small brains to take in?
Finally, I think I’ve missed something somewhere. UK County cricket or the IPL league has a purpose – all the teams play each other in divisions and there’s a champ at the end. Bit like the English Premier Football League, but for cricket. But, why is there excitement over a ‘Test Match’?? England playing Sri Lanka, Australia playing New Zealand or Scotland facing Wales in a ‘Test Match’. Listen people, the clue is in the title – TEST – in other words, it’s a bloody friendly!! There’s nothing to play for, the winner has the satisfaction (if they ever find a winner through the Duckworth Lewis method!) of saying they beat the other team. There’s no trophy, no league title, no moving up the league, no relegation – nothing. it’s like England playing Malta at football – great to see a game, but no meaning whatsoever. SORT IT OUT CRICKET PEOPLE, THIS IS JUST STUPID!
Please, please, please, get someone to ban cricket altogether – drive it underground (literally) or preferably to another planet. Give them their own island where they can play this stupid, tedious and time-wasting past-time before we’re all bored to death!!
Phew. Rant over…
November 28th, 2011 at 8:48 pm
This is opinion and i like all
Sports but cricket rules and footy is only 1 hr long
So in cricket u get more exercise but in footy
U dont move ur lazy fat asses